yellow aspens, fall leaves, colorado trail, kenosha pass, fall colors, blue sky
Trail Running

Do you have any races coming up?

I'm not ready because I wore my body down little by little with every race after which I did not allow space for recovery. I'm not ready because I refused to miss an opportunity to take advantage of the warm, beautiful weather. I'm not ready because I never go to bed early enough for the 3:30 am wake up calls, and the sleep deprivation is compounding. I am not ready because I am depleted. Every run seems to feel more fatigued than the last, to the detriment of my attitude, my enjoyment and the quality of my company for those I run with. I am tired of feeling slow and weak. I am tired of tripping and falling on the trail. The only way to correct these things is not to push harder, but to pull back.

ultramarathon, trail runner, mount hood, trail running, ultrarunning, pacific crest trail, pct, endurance running
Trail Running

That time I ran 50 miles

So – what happens after mile 30? Does a secret door open up to a magical universe where fairies ride on the tips of unicorn horns, the secrets of life whispering forth from the flap, flap, flap of their wings? Nope. It was pretty much just more running and more pain and more joy.

woman on mountain summit, colorado, mount yale, woman hiker, fourteener, sawatch range, woman on mount yale, trail sisters, mountain,
Trail Running

What goes up…

...the goal has been achieved and no matter where you sit, some pointy rock edge is jamming you in the ass - it gets cold and windy and chances are a storm will roll in before too long. Before the journey down the mountain is even over, you find yourself already craving another and reminiscing about the journey up, almost wishing you were still headed in that direction.

trail runner, running, finish line, trail race, ultramarathon, ultrarunning, colorado,
Trail Running

Dirty 30 part one – personal lessons from my first ultra

Right around mile 22 is when things started to go south. I was grinding up a hill, seemingly on the path to Mordor based on the heat and the terrain, when I encountered a hiker. Two runners who kept passing me, sitting to rest until I passed them, only to pass me again, were coming up to pass me for perhaps the 37th time.

boulder, colorado, mountains, sun, solar flare, trails, hiking, trail running
life, Trail Running

Craving leads to suffering, suffering leads to craving pizza

In this era of vision boards and manifesting our desires, how is it different to 'create the life that I want' versus being attached to outcome? I once felt I had a handle on this concept, but as I contemplate it now, it seems to me it's a matter of how much control one has over the outcome that dictates how much suffering attachment creates.

winter trail, snowy trail, winter, snowy forest, snowy trees,
life, Trail Running

I went to the dark recesses of my mind and all I got was this stupid blog post.

I "used to" have this superstition that if I acknowledged an area of my life that was going well or that I was excited about something, I would jinx it and it would all fall apart. I think I still feel that way to a degree. I keep the things that excite me to myself...